Getting clear on intentions. Reflecting on big moves.
On a cold and rainy winter morning in Prague, I am sitting in a coffee shop, sipping a cinnamon cappuccino, waiting on a student that I believe forgot about our first lesson of 2018.
But now I am awake early, already out of my apartment, with coffee in front of me, and I have time to reflect.
Reflect on what? I'm not sure.
2017? My move to Prague? Graduating university and taking a job so far out of my field for the sole purpose of living abroad? My thoughts on this job so far?
There is so much that has happened in my life since January 1st, 2017.
Most of you who read this blog know the gist of these happenings. I finished up my bachelor's degree, I nannny-ed and saved all summer in Atlanta, and then in August I moved to Prague to complete my TEFL certification. At the beginning of September, when Prague was still balmy and green, I moved into a tiny apartment with a girl I had only met a month before, and I started teaching English as a private teacher. Basically meaning that I move throughout the city all. day. long. I have no office, I have nowhere to eat my lunch (tbt to when it was warm outside and I ate my salad on park benches; now it's cold and I usually find myself sitting in the metro station, eating a salad that has been hanging out in my book bag for four hours), and overall I don't make much money.
So what's the deal? What's up with this life I have so suddenly yet so slowly found myself in?
To be honest with you, I am not sure. It's different than I ever pictured it would be. Sometimes I stop in my tracks and think, is this what I wanted? Would I be happier with a steady, 9-5 in Atlanta? Close to home, in a country that speaks my language, my home country, making more money, eating food from the grocery stores I love (looking at you Trader Joe's and Whole Foods), doing yoga in the studios that I adore, and making enough money to actually do regular yoga in a studio? Would I be happier?
I really can't say. I am not doing that. Because of this experience, I will never be a person who says I graduated college and jumped into a 9-5. Never. I am now the person who graduated college, moved abroad, lived in a tiny apartment in a foreign city, and taught English. And that still blows my mind. My very own life still surprises me.
If 2017 has taught me anything, if this MOVE has taught me anything, it's that I can do anything. I can pick up and move across the world. I can make money doing it (not a lot), and I don't need the luxuries I thought I did. I don't necessarily need to make a lot of money.
There are things that I need in order to be happy, besides the basics of food, water, and shelter.
I need my yoga mat: steady, trusty, waiting in my room for me after a long day.
I need a kitchen: big or small, tacky or fancy, just somewhere to create and relax.
I need FaceTime: because family isn't far when you have technology.
I need a big coat: because Prague is really cold.
I need to see the world: because life is short. So short.
So here I am, going without so many things I want, moving a long with what I have, and experiencing life in a whole new way. I've been here, living abroad, without touching U.S. soil, for five months now. I have made a three year old who doesn't speak my language laugh weekly, I have learned how to ski, I have seen Paris, I have survived the first half of a European winter (stay tuned to see if I can survive the second half), and I have proved to myself, if anything, that I am a master at living uncomfortably. The normal life was never for me, because here I am, living so differently than my peers, and I am not particularly miserable doing it.
There are tough days, really tough days. Tough weeks, if I'm honest. Weeks where I question everything. Where I miss home, miss my dog, and where I dream every night of the back roads of the south, the roads that take me to the place I have called home for as long as I can remember. There are weeks where I find myself wishing I had never done this, where I wish I stayed home, got a financially steady job, and could speak to people at a normal speed. But those weeks always end, and then I have a really good day where I couldn't imagine my life being any different.
So, at the end of this, as I am entering 2018, what are my thoughts? What are my future plans? What will the year ahead bring?
It will bring me getting more in touch with what I want out of my future, what I want out of my life. I know I want to be a dietitian and I know I want to teach yoga. I know I want financial abundance. I know that I haven't even seen close to as much of the world as I desire. I know I want a dog. I know I want to cook more. Eat more plants, practice more yoga. I know I want to write more, both on this blog and in my private journal.
So this year ahead of me, this year ahead of all of us, will be about taking the necessary moves to have these things. Setting intentions, manifesting the life I want, and moving towards it. Slowly but surely.
To end this post, I want to say: to you who is reading this, no matter how old you are, what gender you identify as, where you have been, or where you are going: you are capable. You are capable of any of it, of all of it. You are capable of moving abroad, or you are capable of staying home. Get clear on your intentions, on your desires, your wants and your needs, and go after it. If you want to be an artist, a poet, an engineer, or a barista, go after it. Claim that life as yours, and do it. That's how it works. I believe in you, and I truly and honestly know you can do it.
Catch up soon. Xoxo.